


Sleep A Little Longer

by savegalkissy



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Arguing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Exhaustion, Fever Dreams, Fighting, Gabe takes care of Jack, Hurt/Comfort, Jack Needs a Hug, Love Confessions, M/M, Nightmares, Perspective Switching, Sick Character, Sickfic, Sleep Deprivation, argument, jack doesnt take care of himself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 14:31:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18209570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/savegalkissy/pseuds/savegalkissy
Summary: After having a fight, the last thing Gabe wants to think about is Jack.But when he goes to his office, he can’t help it when the muffled sound of sobs escapes the room.Soon, more than just that spill out the overworked Commander.





	Sleep A Little Longer

Gabriel leaned over the desk, his frustration evident in the way he pushed most of his weight onto it. The wood creaked as he stared down at the sitting Strike Commander, whose own hand rests on his temple.

They had been at this for an hour already, and it was clear Jack’s frustrated and annoyed. He just wanted to be done with it, which only made Gabriel push harder. He was close to getting what he wanted, and he rarely backed down from that.

“We need to get in there now, Jack, before the weapon traffickers can take anymore hostages. They know they’re caught- we got them right where we want them.”  
“There’s still members of the UN who need to support the decision before I can officiate the mission, Gabriel.”

**(Jack’s voice is strained, tired. He pinches the bridge of his nose, opening his eyes to look down as a message popped on the holopad. He moves to stand. One such member is ready to talk, and he, of course, needs to look professional. He ignores how he wavers a bit. Gabriel seems to, too.)**

“But people are in trouble now, Jack! Instead of just waiting around- We need to do _something_ . We _could_ do something, I could-“

**(Gabriel keeps talking, despite Jack’s attempts to wave him away. He’s frazzled, dark bags under his eyes as he juggles the holopad in one hand, Gabriel’s frustrated words in another.)**

Gabe grabs the other’s arm, turns him away from the holopad. Can’t Jack see that he didn’t need permission to save people’s lives? _Shouldn’t_ need it?

Jack huffed as he was grabbed, jerking his arm away to say, “I need time Gabriel, please! I have to consider other perspectives here- especially the ones of the officials whose countries will be involved. Now if you would please...“ He turned away from Gabe to get to the call waiting for him.

“So you’re just letting the UN make the decisions now, huh?”

Jack paused. He took a step back from his desk, eyes a sharp glare. He paused the incoming call, with a message promising to respond quickly, just needed a ‘secure location.’

**(What he really needs is for Gabe to shut his mouth.)**

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

Finally, he was listening. Gabriel would have given him a smug look, but he just wasn't in the mood. “Jack, _you’re_ the Strike Commander! This is your position, isn’t it? You’re the one in control here, with power, you’re the one who makes the _decision!_ ” Gabe can’t hide the anger and frustration in his voice, as he finally voices what he’s been thinking for days. “Why do you keep letting other people take that from you?”

“And how do I do that, Reyes?”

“How? Remember _how_ you just let them fire Reinhardt?"

Jack blinked at him, his face hardening, his posture straightening up. He’s closing him out, Gabe knew it when he saw it.

“Ah. So this is what this is about.” He sighed, jaw clenched. “Look, Gabriel,” he starts, trying to keep his voice low. Probably to keep himself from yelling. “The last time I didn’t heed the words of a public official, especially the leader of a country, was the Uprising in London. And as you have so _kindly_ mentioned, you see how that turned out. Reinhardt retireme-”

“How that turned out? He wasn’t retired, Jack! Retirement is a choice, not one he wanted to make. What, are you saying you’re not the one who signed the paperwork, who approved-"

Before Gabriel continued, Jack's hand shot up- right in his face, palm forward in a ‘stop’ motion.

“That’s enough Gabriel. _Dismissed_ .” His voice is cold, and yet, Gabe can feel the hot rage burning underneath. He stepped back, and Jack huffed, putting his hand back up to his temple and rubbing circles into his skin. “I have a call I need to take, _now_. Excuse me,” he said, gesturing for Gabriel to get out.

Gabe wasn’t sure what to do for a second, except stare as the man uncaringly looks back at him. With a huff, Gabriel turned to leave. But as always, he couldn't go without having the final say. “All I’m saying, _Strike Commander_ , is that you have the power. Fucking use it,” he says, low, a simmering in his voice. Jack nonchalantly waved him away, ignoring the words.

* * *

  
The call ended as quickly as it started, the official giving him the last permission needed for a majority. He thanked the man, perhaps more than he should for someone attempting to seem composed and professional, before he settled down to write the order. Pen met paper, and a crippling wave of _hurt_ crashed through his body, knocking him out of his senses for a moment.

' _Gabe hates me_ ,' he thought. He wasn’t sure if the pain was an actual headache, or just the emotions swelling up when they shouldn’t. Was there really a difference at times? He didn’t know. He just cradled his head in both hands, hunching over to hide from the glaring lights in the office. He took a deep breath, not knowing why it hit so hard, at least, not right now. “Athena, turn off the lights,” he muttered.

The darkness gave some relief. Back to reality, he brushed away the pain for as long as he could. He didn’t wait to send out a team- but as he wrote down the order, he paused over the names. A bitter thought came, to use anyone other than Blackwatch’s recruits for this mission, just out of spite. Gabe never gave him time, he always needed to act fast, fast, _fast_ , without question, and get the job done. Jack understood it worked for him- but Gabe couldn’t seem to see that didn’t work for Jack. But as quickly as the bitter thought came, it fluttered away, and Jack sunk back in his chair. _'No, it’s me who’s the problem. Gabe’s right. I wait around. I don’t take charge. God what am I even doing here? I shouldn’t be here, I’m too weak, too slow to the upkeep, too, too-'_ he flinched at his own thoughts, shaking his head to push them away.

Everything was hurting again. He pushed out the orders for Blackwatch to do the mission, and got back to other work. His body wanted to rest, wanted to stop and do anything besides sit at this desk, and worry, and wait for the next thing. But the world was looking at him- _at them all_ \- and he needed to be ready for anything. Ready to protect Overwatch from the vultures above, their Talons sharp.

 

* * *

The next few days passed by in a rush for Gabriel. The mission was pretty standard, despite the intensity. If they hadn’t had hostages, Overwatch’s usual line up could have hauled them down to HQ without a sweat. But hey, at least Jack recognized they needed the delicate touch of a stealth operation, to prevent needless casualties. ‘ _Ugh. Jack._ ’ Gabriel wasn’t quite in the mood to even think about him, the argument a weight on his mind. Was it guilt for being too harsh, over analyzing Jack’s words and his own? No, of course not. Gabriel _totally_ didn’t feel any of that, rather, he was sure it was just a rather killer, semi guilt tripping headache.

But why should he feel guilty? Besides checking in on the mission, Jack hadn’t even bothered to contact them. And as he entered the base, he was greeted by Ana, not the Strike Commander. Even more cold shoulder. Gabriel could barely hide the frown on his face as he approached the Captain.

“Nice to see ya, Amari. What, Morrison couldn’t be bothered to show up?” He asked, the squad walking passed as he spoke. Ana crosses her arms, and sighed.

 “He keeps buzzing in as busy. I can’t blame him, he just got dumped with a new batch of paperwork. I swear those officials just push anything on him for the sake of it. It’s like they’re trying to kill his sleep schedule.”

Gabriel just scoffed, walking with her to medical. Usually, He would just skip out on it, but with Ana there instead of Jack, he wouldn’t have a chance before she dragged him to Dr. Ziegler’s office herself. “Maybe if he wasn’t so busy acting like a stuck up bureaucrat, they wouldn’t be so willing to stick him with everything under the sun,” he said, crossing his arms.

“I’m sensing some hostility here.” Despite her comment, Gabriel’s petulant comment made her smile.

“Ugh. I don’t even want to think about it, Ana.”

“You can’t just drop a juicy detail and _not_ give me the rest of the drama,” Ana teased him, softly punching him on the arm as they walk. “What’s bothering you? Did you two fight again?”

Gabe let out a sigh. He pressed his lips together. He could never lie for long to Ana. “... Yes. But c'mon, Ana. He was _waiting_ to send us out there, waiting for approval, of all things. People’s lives were endangered, Ana, we can’t just wait!”

Ana’s smile fell, and she cast her eyes down. “Ever the impatient one."

"Hey-"

"You know I agree with you, Gabriel. But... well, there’s a lot of factors at play. Especially with issues like this. And you know that, know it's more complex than just sending a team out. This isn't the Omnic crisis anymore.”

At that, Gabriel dipped his head. She was right, of course. Overwatch was, technically, a foreign entity to pretty much any country, and a military one at that. He could understand the political ramifications of it just, well, doing whatever it wanted, but he can’t help but think:  
“If they gave us the power to help, why don’t they let us use it? They gave Jack the power to choose in these decisions, and not only are governments trying to stop him, half the time he stops _himself_ from using it.”

Ana pursed her lips, nodding and thinking. “Perhaps you should visit him. Ask him why. If he’s not confident in using his powers it can be bad for us all. Though… I suppose the depth of his position can be somewhat lost on us. After all, you and I both passed it up because it didn’t suit us. And well, I haven’t... actually seen him since you left, and the people who have, well, they’ve been whispering about how he looks. Lena told me he looked like a zombie who hasn’t quite rotted yet.”

He gave her a look, and nearly snorted. “What?” But he quickly composed himself, biting his lip. “Why should I care what he’s doing?” That got him a ‘look’ from Ana, one eyebrow raised, a lecture on her tongue. He relented before she even could begin, her angry face not one he wanted to deal with.

“Okay, okay, _fine_. I’ll go talk to him. I can’t make any promises though.” He knew she was right. They’re all stressed, and being hostile wasn’t the way to go. And if Jack was avoiding them, he needed to fix that too. The Strike Commander can’t just hide from his responsibilities, after all.

“How about I go now, and catch up on medical lat- ow! Ana, you’re nails are sharp! My ear!”

* * *

After medical, and a few overdue shots, Gabriel rubbing his arm, he walked to the man’s office. Tension was in his neck, as he was sure they were about to have another confrontation. He _didn’t_ want to argue again, especially after just getting back, but if Jack’s shut himself in, someone has to pull him out. And with Jack, that was always a fight.

He stopped in front of the office, and stared up at the cold, metal door. A frown graced his lips, as he reached out to open it with his card, before he stopped himself. He wasn’t nervous. Not at all.

Except he was. He rested his head against the office door, sighing. Their friendship had been taking a dive. He _couldn’t_ describe it, why it was. It just had been. After years of being close and tight knit, the best of buddies, things had started to get tense. He paused his thoughts however, a noise coming from the other side. It was as if... no. But could it be? It was a small, distant noise, but it just grabbed his attention. He knocked, trying to catch the man’s attention. “Jack?”

The noise didn’t stop, but neither did he receive a response. He blinked, a sinking feeling in his gut. He pressed his ear to the door, not sure why, because he already _knew_ what the sound is. Sobbing. It’s muffled, but he knew it all the same. Guilt pooled in his stomach too, and worry double fold. He knocked again, harder, but once more, no response. Gabe could only frown. “Jack? Are you ignoring me?” He called out. More sobs, no words. “I’m coming in.”

Yet he hesitated. For only a moment, almost scared of what he could find on the other side. But he couldn’t just worry. He had to act.

He keyed in. The door slid open, and he stepped into the dark, dreary office. It took his eyes a moment to adjust, but he already had a clear idea of the space. It was a mess, crumpled papers strewn about, the Strike Commander’s usually strikingly blue cape thrown onto the floor, messy and in need of a washing. And at his desk, the man himself wasn’t fairing much better than the scenery around him.

Jack was slumped on his desk, curled in on himself as he rested with his arms crossed, head nestled on top. He seemed asleep. The sniffling sounds that escaped him- his shoulders shaking- made Gabriel doubt for a second if he was. Gabe approached, and leaned in to take a good look at him. Jack definitely seemed to be unconscious on some level. His eyes were closed, his brows furrowed deeply, but there was a weak stream of tears falling. Could someone cry in their sleep? He wanted to doubt it, but well, Jack hadn’t even heard him knock, or open the door. Gabriel walked cautiously behind the desk, a barrier he hadn’t passed in a while.

“Jack? You okay?” Gabe whispered first, making sure he didn’t startle him. Was he having a nightmare? Jack got those often, but he would usually wake up from them quick. Hell, a pin dropping could wake Jack. Which made Gabriel all the more worried, as he reached out and put a hand on his back. Jack tensed, a sob catching in his throat. Gabriel ran soothing circles into the tense muscle.

The motion calmed Jack instantly, and the sniffling died down. Gabriel looked at his face, saw the tension give way as his eyebrows unfurl and his expression became a calm neutral. Gabe sighed, and reached over, wiping the warm tears away from Jack’s red, swollen cheeks. How long had he been like this? Since he left?

Gabriel started to pull Jack’s chair out. He couldn’t just let the man rest like this. He clearly needed to go to bed and _actually_ lay down. Waking him would be easier, but… Would it really? Gabe could only see two ways that would go. Either Jack would resist the idea of sleep, or just protest Gabe’s presence entirely, which Gabe had to admit, hurts more than the former. He just needed to carry him to bed, no big deal.

 **(He’s stuck. He’s** **_stuck_** **. He’s stuck and he doesn’t know what to do. He feels like he’s pinned under a collapsing building, and he’s desperately trying to build it back up around him. And then, suddenly, somethings pushing him up, giving him the strength to get out of it.)**

He scooped Jack up bridal style, and started to lift him from the seat. The man’s head jerked upright, and he gave a harsh, choking gasp.

 **(He feels the soft touch, something reassuring at first. It gives him enough support to climb his way out of the dark, and he thinks he knows what it is. ‘** ** _Vincen_ ** **-‘ he starts, turning around, but when he looks down, the dark hand isn’t who he thought it was. Before he gets a chance to question it- he feels something catch in his throat. He’s surrounded by dark smoke, can’t breathe, can’t breathe,** **_can’t breathe_** **.)**

Gabe dropped him back down. Guess he wasn't too deep asleep _._ Gabe fell back into the room’s shadow, stepping out of arm's reach. Getting decked by a panicking Strike Commander was really the last thing he needed. But Jack didn’t panic.

Instead, he just messily coughed, and groaned, squinting ahead of him like he didn’t even see Gabe off to the side. A few deep breaths, the man clutching his chest, and then he looked as if he was in a trance. Gabriel pinched the bridge of his nose, and reached over again, this time to wave his hand in front of the dull, glazed over eyes.

It actually took Jack a moment to register the movement, confusion filling his face, before his eyes widened and he nearly flung himself backwards. ‘ _He's really out of it,_ ’ Gabe thought. Jack seemed so... sluggish. His brain was running slow.

**(Everything’s a haze, fuzzy. The screen is too bright, his skin is too hot. He vaguely notes a presence in the room with him, but the haze around him makes him feel like nothing is real. Until ‘it’ clearly asserts his presence as very, very _real_.)**

“Gabe...?” His gravelly voice sounded too quiet, too low for Gabe’s taste. “What are you... doing here?” He asked, yawning as he spoke. He had deep bags under his eyes, and while being startled had woke him up a little- he could barely keep them open. Gabe noted a constant bobbing of his head.

“What? What am I doing here? Are you fuckin-” He took a deep breath. He knew he needed to reason with Jack. ‘ _No, not the time to argue, Gabriel_ ,’ he reminded himself. “Jack, have you gotten out of this office since I left?”

Jack blinked. There was a pause, his eyes glancing away as he visibly struggled to think. “Uhm.... I... think so?” He said, looking up and counting under his breath. “I went... to the bathroom, and the mess hall to get food...”

“That’s _not_ what I meant. Have you gone to bed?”

“I’ve fallen asleep...?”

“ _Jack_.”

“Gabe?” He sounded so sheepish. Gabe’s heart shouldn’t shouldn’t have hurt from it.

“Falling asleep at your desk _doesn’t_ count.” Usually, he would sound like he was scolding the man. But there’s no bite to the words, just a deep concern.

Jack’s face turned a deep red, and he looked down- ashamed, maybe?. Gabriel isn’t sure what Jack is thinking- _if at all_ \- when he turned his head away, back to the holo screen on his desk. “It does when you need to file a backlog of reports,” he said, and the defensive tone almost sounds whiny.

 **(The embarrassment flooding his cheeks gave Jack a surge of energy, and he knows he must look and sound ridiculous. But he can’t just _admit_ that. He can’t show he’s weak and falling apart. He's gotta focus, on work. The bright holographic light is just a blur to his eyes. But… He ** **_has_ ** **to do it. Or else everything will fail, fuck up, and fall around him.)**

“Jack,” Gabe groaned, already losing him. Couldn’t he see he was being unreasonable? Gabe ran a hand down his face, “C’mon. Just get up. You need to go to bed.”

“I don’t... need... to do anything,” Jack defied, yet choosing his words carefully. Gabe thought he was trying to sound more lucid and awake than he actually was. He was failing. “I’mma super soldier. Can run without sleep... f’ days.”

“Yeah, I’ve been there, bud. I’d say paperwork isn’t as dire as retreating from Omnics, though.” He moved the holopad aside, and cupped Jack’s cheeks to get him to look back up. “But still, we _need_ sleep, like any other human. And just like any other human, not getting it fucks with us bad.”

Still, Jack refused. “I’m fine,” he kept insisting, and shook his head free of Gabriel’s hands, trying to grab the holopad back. His hands were shaky, and could barely keep a grasp.

Gabe had the urge to take the holopad and throw it across the room, just to get it out of Jack’s reach. But he remembered Ana’s advice. _Ask him why, maybe. Just talk to him_ . And well...He _was_ trying. But maybe he needed Jack to follow her advice too. He looked Jack over again, saw how red his eyes were, his still swollen cheeks, and the way he was just so... tense, trying to ignore Gabriel’s presence in favor of a screen.

Gabe blocked access to the holopad by leaning on the desk, as he tried to get Jack to focus on him again. “Okay. Look. I’m sorry about the other day, how I lost my cool. Can we talk about this, at least?”

Jack replied with short, emotionless words. A mask. “It’s okay.” He moved to the holopad, leaning over Gabriel as he tried to grab it from behind him.

“...And I’m sorry that I’m not being clear with you, as much as I would like. It’s just frustrating to have it feel like I’m doing something wrong when I’m just trying to help people.” Gabriel squinted at him, leaning over more to get in his way, lifting his arm, practically laying on the desk.

“Mhm.” Did Jack not see how ridiculous this looked? the man was seriously trying to ignore him even like _this_. He wasn’t even listening! Well, he knew one way to make him.

“And I’m sorry I... broke into your room and threw all your whiskey out.”

“It’s... wait, you did what?!” Gabriel snorted as the man quickly dropped the facade, and looked back at him, bewilderment clear on his face. His cheeks flushed again as Gabriel laughed, brows furrowing in confusion before he realized he’d been had. Jack punched the other’s arm, though it was just a tap. Gabriel was glad he wasn’t actually angry. “So you’re listening now, huh?”

 **(When he saw the laughter in Gabriel’s eyes, the way it appeared in the smile at the corner of his cheeks, he could only soften. He just wants to smooth things over and get it done with. But he can’t help being** **_vulnerable_ ** **when Gabriel teases him like this. He gives a pout to hide the grin forming, shaking his head. Bad move. Nausea hit him, hard.)**

As Jack shook his head at Gabe, he flinched, and grimaced. He leaned back in his seat, and Gabe sat up, his laughter turning to a worried noise. “Jack? What’s wrong?”

Jack gave a forceful gulp, and pressed his palm to his face, trying to push away what Gabriel assumed was pain. “Dizzy. Really dizzy… just give me a moment…”  Gabe reached over again, this time carding his gloved hand through hair, that was a bit sticky from sweat.

“See? You need to take a break. At this point this is just stubbornness, Jack.” Stubbornness he wished would manifest elsewhere in the man. Honestly, he could be so-

“I can’t.”

There’s a pause, and a look between them. Jack… just sounded so defeated.

“What do you mean you can’t?”

“I just... I can’t. I _can’t_. I have to work, work, work. On these reports. On mission details. On anything, because if I don’t...” the words start pouring, and Gabriel finally gets a sense that there’s something... deeper about how Jack’s been acting.

**(He didn’t mean to say that out loud. But perhaps the part of his brain that filters his thoughts is still out of commission. In fact, he’s sure of it cause he can’t stop.)**

“... if I make one mistake, just… Everything will start to crumble and fall. And I can’t let it, I can’t let it do that. I’ve put, so, so much effort into, into _this_ , all of this. If I stop, if I don’t keep working, it will all fall apart and I’ll be left behind, but I guess I’m already being left behind and there’s so much going on, and I don’t know what’s going on anymore between you and me or Overwatch and the world and what is Overwatch _except_ my world and all I have anymore and-“

**(His heart flutters as he speaks, trying to stop himself, but he’s faster than his mind is. He’s never told anyone how it feels, always scared if he even started it would come out too quickly for him to bare.)**

**(He was right.)**

It’s too much at once. Gabriel reached out, and put a finger on Jack’s lips, silencing him for a second. He took a breath, trying to catch up with all of that, and give Jack a moment too. “I know this might be hard for you, but one at a time, Jack.”

Jack paused, before Gabe pulled back and let him speak. He watched as Jack looked down at the floor, floundering to find the words. Gabe let him stumble on by himself, giving him the time to organize... whatever all that was.

He paused for just a moment too long, and Gabe saw he needed a push. “You said you were feeling, uhm. Left behind? Care to... explain?” He asked, a bit awkwardly. He isn’t used to playing therapist, that was usually Reinhardt’s job.

Jack closed his eyes, and Gabe feared he would fall asleep right then and there. But a sigh escaped his lips, Jack slowly nodding. His words quivered as he spoke.

“Everyone, is moving on so fast. I feel like there’s always a new batch of recruits, or old ones are resigning and leaving for different things. We face and take down one threat, another rises. After Reinhardt retired... it’s just been... it feels like Overwatch isn’t what it used to be.”

 **('** ** _It feels like_ ** **I’m** **_not what I used to be.’_** **)**

Gabriel nodded, and he slowly took Jack’s hands in his own, running his thumb over the palms. He encourages him to continue, letting him relax. “It has changed a lot, hasn’t it?” Gabriel urged.

Jack nods. “Yeah… I don’t know. It just feels like everything we’ve...”

“Built?” Gabe supplied, Jack’s voice stalling.

“Yes. Built. Everything we’ve... I’ve... to keep this place together... to keep _us_ all together, it isn’t working. I can’t... I can’t figure out... what I would do if you all weren’t here. What would I even...”  
  
Gabriel doesn’t say anything as Jack trails off. He just keeps his hands on the other’s, watching as the tired man’s expression shows... something. He’s not sure what to describe. He wants to say fear, but it’s something more. Something deeper, in those eyes. Then it clicks. “You don’t want to be alone.”

Jack looked up, and gave a small nod.

( **Gabriel says it so easily, while Jack has taken years to even recognize the feeling. He feels stupid. Knows he shouldn’t. But he does.** **_Cause he is_.** **)**

“But... you’re not, Jack. We’re here for you-“

“No. You’re not.”

Gabriel was taken aback, and let go of Jack’s hands. A defensiveness, a need to argue that sprang up, but before he can say anything, Jack continued.

“You _can’t_ be. None of you can. I can’t ask you to be here for me in the ways I want. Not like... this. You’re all supposed to be coworkers. But I feel like you’re family. Fuck. You guys _are_ my family. But then... all of you have, stuff, outside of Overwatch, and I don’t. You, Ana, Torb, you have _actual families_ . And Reinhardt and Torbjorn are basically brothers at this point. When I tag along outside of... _this_ ,” he gestured to the messy room around them, “I just feel like... like an intruder. Like I don’t belong, and I just feel so… pathetic.”  
  
**(Ana’s wedding. Gabe’s wedding. Gabe’s divorce. Numerous vacations with the two. It all comes to mind, feeling like the most awkward and unwanted version of a third wheel, all because no one's quite sure what to do with him, not even himself. After Vincent all those years ago... he just sort of...)** ****  
  
“All I am is... Strike Commander. I don’t fit, as Jack Morrison, the person. But then,” Jack paused, and looked up at Gabe, eyes fearful as he figured it out. “Then… if I’m not a good Strike Commander, what am I, Gabe?”

Gabriel frowned as the words echoed his own from the fight, and reached up, cupping Jack’s cheek. Had he… brought all this on?

Jack just rested against his firm hand, closing his eyes.  Gabe saw the dark bags under his eyes. “That’s... a lot Jack. I’m sorry,” he started. “I didn’t think you’d be so... affected by what I said-“

Jack gave what was a small whisper of a laugh. “It's not just you. It’s been like this since the beginning. Since I accepted the position, broke up with Vincent…”

Gabe’s heart hurt at the mention. He wasn’t sure why- he’s never liked the mention of the old partner, despite the fact he was nothing but a good a man to Jack. But the way the break up had practically tore Jack apart, even if it was his decision? Right at the beginning of Overwatch...? He perhaps... held a tinge of resentment, of not something else, because Jack hadn’t needed the emotional turmoil right then.

But as Jack himself had said many times, Overwatch’s business would just make Vincent unhappy. There would never be a “good time” to break up. It was just, as Gabe watched Jack try to explain himself, he could tell the same hurt was coming back. And he wanted to soothe it over.

“I just. I don’t know. I feel like after him, all I had was... _this_.” He gestured vaguely aroind him, at the messy room. “So I sunk... everything into this. But it’s all... it’s all just...” Jack’s voice wavered, and he didn’t finish the sentence. Gabriel frowned, another moment of silence between them. Then, he stood from the desk, and wrapped his arms around the other man. Jack tensed immediately- no longer used to the level of affection, but it didn’t take long for him to start melting into it, eyes closed tight.

“Let’s get you to bed.”

* * *

 

 **(Jack realized a long time ago the thing he had been afraid of most-** **_settling down, having a family, being someone other than a soldier_ ** **\- was something he wanted more than anything. And he lost the chance. He keeps fighting, but for what? He just… doesn’t want to fight anymore. He buries himself into Gabriel’s chest. When Gabe asked him to get up, this time, he listened.)**

Gabriel helped him walk back to his personal quarters, guiding him while he has his face buried in the palms of his hands. Gabe’s not sure if it’s because he’s embarrassed to have anyone see him like this, or if it’s because his head hurts, a small whimper sometimes escaping Jack as they walked passed sunlit windows. But soon, they get to the bedroom, and the rest of the base seems melts away.

**(He's scared he's going to be stuck here. Forever. When it all falls apart. And he's going to drag everyone down with him, like the mistake he is.)**

Gabriel’s priorities are fixed on the man with him, and nothing else.

**(God, he wants nothing more than to be out of Overwatch. But he doesn't want to leave it behind. He's in limbo, forever.)**

Jack’s exhaustion took over as they entered the privacy and safety of the familiar room, collapsing on his bed and slumping over, sleep filling his form almost instantly. Gabriel moved and turned him onto his back, before placing the covers over him. He stroked Jack’s cheek, and frowned. There’s a heat coming from his face, a growing warmth rising on his skin, and Gabe did the smart thing. “Athena, call Dr. Ziegler for me.”

* * *

The world was back to a fuzzy, smoky mess. Jack couldn’t tell where he was, though he’s finally out of the mess he made, at least. He examined the area around him. It’s dark, night time. But he can tell he’s up high, a familiar view before him. It’s the one he gets from his office everyday, looking out over the base. Except… everything has broken down.

This is it. It’s no longer HQ. It’s a ruin. A tower of his mistakes. He walked slowly at first, sneaking, but his steps seem to crash down below him. Then… Glass cracks, paper crunches, echoing throughout. His chest tightens, and he pauses. A glance down reveals to see a photo under his foot. The farm and his parents. Something flashed by in the corner of his eye, and he jumped.

He quickly turns to face whatever passes by, but the shadow was gone. “Who‘s there?” He asks, but his voice felt so weak, so low. It’s like he can’t even speak.

Nothing happens, so he just hopes he was alone. He took a breath, slow, steeling himself. He turns back around, and started to track through the rubble, trying to find anything, anything at all to show him what had happened here.

A flash of dark again, formless tendrils reaching out around him. The world slows as he looks, staring at the smoky forms shifted and changed before his eyes, in a flash of a second.

Jack stumbled, something grabbing him by the neck. He was jerked back right as a bunch of debris gave way, falling in where he would have been standing, petrified. He couldn’t move back as he was lifted into the air, made to turn around and face his captor.

“You let me go, Jack,” a cacophony of voices rang. Jack winced, and shook his head, eyes watering as he was overwhelmed. “You let all of us go, Jack… but we’ll never let you go, Jack.” Disharmonious voices laugh, so loud, everywhere at once. He tries to get a look, but there’s just too many of them. Too many mistakes and failures, coming for him.

He struggles and yelps and sobs, feeling the many hands of his past, present, and future latch on. Panic sets in, his chest pounding, his eyes wide, feeling darkness surround him. He panted, before struggling to break free. Smoke chokes his lungs.

But Jack doesn’t give up fighting. He pushes and shoves, flailing and throwing himself around. He slips free. He’s doing it- he’s winning! He pulls back, kicking the hands away and pulling his arms free. He falls backwards, expecting to catch himself and get a running start.

He forgot about the hole.

He plummets into the abyss, eyes wide as he realizes too late.

* * *

Gabriel sighed as he made something for lunch, hearing the muffled sobs and whimpering whines of the man as he slept through what sounded like a terrible nightmare. Jack’s bad dreams were something else. But he usually woke up from them before they got too bad. Light sleeper and all. This time though, the man just… wasn’t. And there just wasn’t much he could do. His attempts to either soothe or wake him failed, or even worsened the state of the man. He just really hoped it would end soon.

Then, he heard a noise. A different noise. A choking gasp, as Jack woke with a startle. A moment of panic ran through Gabe’s veins, his worry skyrocketing. Was he alright? He stood from the coffee table, setting aside the paperwork, and went to Jack’s side. Jack desperately gasped for air, gripping the sheets under him. Gabe saw how those out of focus, blue eyes darting about, before he whimpered out in fear.

“Jack? Are you okay?” He asked. He didn’t hide his concern, moving to sit by him on the bed.

“No,” the sick man croaked out, turning over, breathing hard. He buried his face deep into a pillow, a groan escaping him. Gabriel sympathetically hummed, and began running his hand through messy blonde hair.

“Was it a bad one?” He asked, already knowing the answer. He noticed the heat from his fever seemed to have simmered up, and he furrowed his brows.

“Mmmhm.” Jack slowly opened his teary eyes to look around, before flinching in pain. “Turn off t’lights,” He croaked again, a less formal and slurred accent to his speech, the man’s farm boy peaking through. He got a comforting pet in response, Gabe trying to massage his scalp and neck. God, Jack's heart must have really been pounding.

**(Everything hurts. His eyes feel like they’re being pushed out his skull, he feels hot and cold at the same time, and his head feels like it’s gonna burst at any moment. Every time he opens his eyes it just hurts more… but the touches on his back and neck make it bearable, and he almost wants to cry, it’s the only relief.)**

“The lights are off, curtains drawn too. It’s the afternoon, though. I don’t think I can turn off the sun for you, Jackie.” The way he begged with his tone, god, it made Gabe want to. Jack leaned up into his touch.

“Mm... can y’ try...?”

Gabriel laughs softly, minding what no doubt was a bad headache for the other. “Well, I don’t think I can, but maybe you’ll feel better if you drink some water, along with some medicine I have,” he said, giving the back of Jack’s neck another squeeze, the other tensing up, before a moan escaped him and he relaxed right under his palm.

“Sounds a’ight. Ya’so smart, Gabe...”

“Well, it’s what Angela told me to do.”

“Mm… Angie? Why’d you tell her... she’s gonna kill me, f’ not sleeping...”

“You _were_ asleep. Clearly, she can’t kill an unconscious man. That’s just unfair. So, if you want to keep avoiding her medical wrath, the simplest way is to rest. Go back to sleep, Jackie.” With that, he got up to get the water and medicine.

Jack nearly laughed, but instead just gave a hum with a nod. Gabriel returned to his side, and helped him sit up, letting the other shield his sensitive eyes against the fabric of his shirt. Gabe felt the heat of his skin, his fever burning full force. Jack just keeps humming, taking the glass from him.

Gabe’s not sure what Jack was thinking. If he’s thinking anything at all. ‘ _Just_... _Seems so tired. It’s a miracle his brain is still working_ ,’ he thought to himself, as Jack downed the glass with medicine mixed in a single gulp.

**(Gabe’s so nice and so kind and so everything, fuck, he’s in love. He loves him…)**

He yawned, and pressed against Gabriel instead of laying back down. Gabe blinked at him in confusion, but didn’t protest, instead going back to stroking through his hair, occasionally rubbing circles into his shoulders. Jack nestled his head against his chest, and muttered something, too low to hear.

**(Loves him, loves him, loves him…)**

“What was that, Jack?” Gabe asked, thinking perhaps he’s asking for something.

“Mm... said I... love you...” He said a bit louder, closing his eyes. Within a few minutes, the man was blissfully back to sleep, with Gabe blinking down at him, shock on his face.

* * *

  
The next time Jack woke, he just felt heavy. Not in a bad way, but a comfortable one- there were several thick blankets over him, the weight comfortably pressing down on him. He slowly opens his eyes, but he’s greeted to a dull gray. Something’s covering his eyes, a bit wet, cool on his skin. He reached up, pulling off a wet rag, and squinted as he adjusted to the light.

The first thing he noticed was that his head didn’t hurt as much anymore. Neither did his eyes feel like popping out of his head. The room was also darker, adding to the relief. He could vaguely remember waking up in a bright room, his eyes burning, what must have been a few hours prior.

 _‘Night time_ ,’ he thought, and slowly sat up, grunting a bit as he propped himself up on his elbows. He might be awake, but his body still felt asleep. Everything’s a bit weaker than usual, stretching slowly and barely moving at the speed he wanted it to. The strength wasn’t in him. Still, he got himself sitting against the headboard, and started to rub the feeling back into his arms, squeezing his hands open and closed to get the blood flowing into his palms. He paused when he heard movement. Then, a voice:  
“Jack? You awake?”

It’s Gabe. He sounded concerned, but also… relieved? Jack can barely question it before his nose woke up next. The delicious, buttery flavor of pancakes and syrup filled the air. Little late to be having breakfast, but he’d take it. His stomach growled loudly.

“Yeah,” he said back, rubbing his sleep filled eyes. Footsteps came from the kitchen, and Gabriel was soon in front of him. Their eyes met, and Jack gave a small, sheepish smile. “I’m surprised you’re still here. Shouldn’t you be sleeping too, Gabe?”  
  
Gabriel just had an amused look. “Jack, It’s morning. I did sleep. So did you, for _quite_ a while,” he said. He reached over, and felt Jack’s forehead before the man had a chance to react to him. “Hm. You’re not as hot anymore, that’s good. Hopefully you sweat out the fever.”  
  
“Fever?” Jack asked, before his mind quickly supplied him with more questions. “How long have I been out? Shit, did I sleep all day? Oh, no, my work-“  
  
Gabriel cups both his cheeks, and makes Jack look at him. “It’s being taken cared of. Relax. _Please_.” There’s something desperate in that voice that makes Jack stop, looking up at him. Gabriel sat down, and sighed.

“You’ve been asleep for a couple of days. Woke up a few times, but I’m pretty sure your brain was deep fried, cause you didn’t do much except... well... nothing really.” He explained. There’s something hidden there, and Jack squints at him. Gabe just smiled, before he continued. “I’ve been here, taking care of you. Since you don’t seem capable of doing it yourself,” he said, giving a pointed look.

  
**(He smiles as he thinks of Jack, and his barely conscious state the last few days. All he did was talk, muttering out whatever thoughts came to him. Usually they weren’t that bad, but he was just so** **_clingy_ ** **, and kept calling for Gabe for the few moments he had consciousness. If he wasn’t calling for Gabe, instead he would be professing his love for him, in sappy sentimental statements. Even if it was Angela or Ana with him, he’d just keep doing it. Gabriel couldn’t help but find it adorable. For the sake of Jack’s pride, he won’t remind him about Ana and Angela’s reactions.)**

“You had a fever, it was pretty bad. Angela said it wasn’t anything too serious, though. I think, your lack of self care- _to put it nicely_ \- just made everything in your body decided to fuck up at once. Ya know. Just went ahead, let us deal with it all, since you wouldn’t,” he scolded, though the words weren’t angry, somewhat teasing. Gabe softly smiled, and put a hand on Jack’s shoulder. “But seems like you’re back with us, this is the most lucid I’ve seen you.”

**(He’s so happy to see his eyes are clear of fog, and there’s a focus to his words rather than rambling. Despite how cute Jack is when he’s looking for him, he still couldn’t help but worry. Plus, now that he’s awake, he can ask about... no, he shouldn’t. Should he?)**

Jack blinked dumbly at him, and pressed his lips into a thin line. He felt... confused mainly. He understood Gabriel, but knowing he had just lost days worth of time make him freak out, just a little. He gulped down the feeling, and looked down, a bit of shame in his eyes. “Sorry. I guess I got really carried away this time…”

  **(‘** ** _Yes, you did’_ ** **, he thinks. But after that long talk, can he blame him? He’s overwhelmed. Gabriel was doing paperwork with Ana, and the sheer amount of it… he’s suspecting there’s a** **_reason_ ** **there’s so much, not just because it’s Jack’s job to do it. Some of it was truly superfluous. But he pushes those thoughts aside, focusing on those blue eyes.)**

Gabriel’s quiet in response, just examining him. Jack blinked up at him, and shifted away. He never liked being stared at, and he wondered what Gabe was thinking. Negative thoughts came, filling his head. There goes his reprieve- Gabriel cups his cheeks, and makes him look at him.

**(Gabriel can see he’s retreating, and he’s not letting him get far away again.)**

“You’re okay. It’s not your fault- I mean, you have some responsibility, of course. But talking to you, it’s clear you need help that’s a bit bigger than just bed rest.”

Jack looked at him, and he slowly nodded. He sighed, reaching up and pulling Gabe’s hands down. But he didn’t let them go, he just held them, staring down. “Help. Yeah.”

**(Gabriel looks down, and he’s sure he should be blushing. But Jack holding his hands just feel right. He’s sure he’s just grounding himself- but for Gabe, it makes his heart soar. He bites his lips. Maybe he should ask…)**

“Hey… When you were out of it, you… talked a lot. And you said some things, that I’m wondering, if... you meant?”

There’s a nervousness in Gabe’s words, a tone Jack wasn’t used to hearing. But he _had_ heard it before. When Gabriel was dating, asking advice from him, or from Ana, even Reinhardt sometimes. He wanted to say the memories are painful, but they aren’t. Yeah, realizing he... Had missed out on a chance, and that Gabe was in love had hurt. But Gabriel was happy then. What he wouldn't give for Gabe to be happy. If he was nervous now, though, Jack had to wonder why.

Well... What could he say to Gabe? “Well. I can’t exactly... Remember much. The last few days have been a big blur.”

Gabe’s face fell, and he bit his lip. “Oh.”

Jack could practically feel the disappointment. The last thing he wanted to do is upset Gabe, so he squeezed his hand, softly.”

“What did I say? You can’t just tell me I was crazy sleep talking and _not_ tell me what about.” Jack imitated Ana, with the sentence and his voice.

Gabriel let out a soft snort, and shook his head. “It’s… nothing."

“It doesn’t sound like nothing.”

“If you don’t remember, then it’s probably for the best.”

“Well, now that’s just _concerning_. C’mon Gabe, please?"

**(Gabriel shook his head as Jack pressed farther, leaning in closer to him. He shouldn’t be so bothered by the other being close- after all, they were bunk buddies in SEP, slept close, ate close, bathed close. But it was different when you realized you were…)**

Gabriel pulled back from Jack, and ran a hand over his face. “It’s stupid. I’m probably looking too deep into it, probably heard you wrong or something because I’m…”

**(‘** **_In love_ ** **.’ That’s all Gabe could describe it as. And when Jack looked at him like that, a mixture of playful concern and genuine curiosity, he couldn’t help but feel it bubble in his chest.)**

“Hey, don’t disappear into your head, Gabe.” Jack said, before pausing. Had he said something wrong to Gabe? Rude? Did they argue again, or did he just do something embarrassing? “I didn’t say anything bad, did I?”

Gabe frowned, and turned right back to him. A soft look came to those deep, brown eyes. Just the look, it made Jack’s cheeks warm. But his words, made him blush even more.

“You said, you said… that you loved me.”

There was a pause as Jack processed that. He blinked, stared up at him for a moment, opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. “Oh. _Oh_.”

**(Jack has that fish out of water look to him, that almost makes Gabriel laugh. If it weren’t for the fact he can feel his heart racing. If Jack doesn’t actually feel that way, what can he do? Did he just needlessly embarrass them both? What if he’s making him uncomfortable, or coming off too strong, or-)**

“I do.” Jack took a breath, to calm himself.

“Huh?”

“I mean… yeah, I do love you. I meant it.”

There was another pause, this time it was Gabriel’s turn to let the information just… sink in. Then, he placed a hand on Jack’s cheek, eyes searching Jack's. For _something._ He leaned in, careful. Maybe he was trying to see if Jack was telling the truth. Or if it was okay, for them to feel like this together, considering their positions.

But Jack was too tired to lie to him. Too tired to care if it was okay. He just gave him a smile, doing his best to reassure Gabe. He nuzzled against his hand. Leaning forward, he pressed their lips together, in the softest, gentlest kiss.

And... They just kissed. For a little while, before Gabriel pulled away. He stared once more, before a laugh started to bubble from his lips. Jack blinked in confusion, but he didn’t say anything. He just smiled, as Gabriel pulled him in close. He wrapped his arms tightly around him, as Gabe let out a shudder, breathing in and letting himself relax. Jack was surprised he had gotten so tense.

“God, Jack. I missed… feeling something like this.” He said, and let his head rest in Jack’s shoulder. “I’ll never let you go.”

Jack smiled, a moment, ignoring the way those words seemed to ominously echo in his head. He nodded his head, shaking the feeling away. He just wanted to enjoy this. Enjoy Gabriel, and being engulfed by him. Enjoy loving him, letting the feeling free.

He closed his eyes, reality feeling like a dream. Except, when he opened them, it was just as real as before. He laughed, and started to press a flurry of kisses onto the other's neck.

"Hey! That tickles!"


End file.
